Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep
by somethingkute
Summary: Sesshoumaru thought that he was strong enough to face anything, but what happens when tragedy strikes too close to home. Will he ever wake up from this nightmare?


Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep

"Tensaiga, I don't ask you for much, hell, I don't ask you for anything at all, but hear my pleading cry, for it is the only time you or any other will ever hear it, save her."

Sesshomaru stayed there, on the ground next to the exact spot where she had died. Soon morning came, then nightfall again. Still he did not move. They watched him for a long time, Jaken and Rin.

"My Lord," she pleaded, "please don't be sad."

Jaken was expecting a glance or an order to take Rin away, but nothing. Instead he remained kneeling clutching his sword in his hand.

'I have someone to protect,' he thought, 'is it too late? No, you must, I beg you bring her back to me, Tensaiga.'

Days went by and Jaken and Rin began to worry. Jaken decided that he needed to get help. All that he could go to was Inuyasha and his friends.

"Please, you've got to help him he's been there in that same spot for eight days now, no sleep, no food, not even blinking, just kneeling there with his sword in his hand. I fear that if he's either going to lose his mind or take his own life." Jaken began to weep, leading Rin to let out a whimpering cry.

"My Lord Sesshomaru!"

Inuyasha stood there in shock.

"Has Sesshomaru truly developed feelings? Has her death really left him on the verge of insanity? No, this is Sesshomaru here. He has no remorse, he is the "Killing Perfection." This can't be true."

But still he went, only to find Sesshomaru still in the meadow stroking the blade of his sword.

"A sword that doesn't cut," he said quietly."What's it good for? It can't bring her back, it wouldn't let me save her; it wants me to suffer, to shed tears or even blood."

Inuyasha gazed at Sesshomaru in amazement then notice his hands, chest, and torso were bleeding.

"What did you do?!"

"Perhaps if it sees my blood it will know my intentions are pure."

"Don't tell me you're trying to kill yourself now! You've really lost it! It's not like you were trying to play hero before. So what's the big idea of trying to now?"

"You could be right. I could've saved her a long time ago, but I didn't. It's my fault!" He said clinching his fist tightly, making blood spill from his hand as his claws dug into his palms.

"Stop it Sesshomaru! She's dead there's nothing you or me or anyone else can do about it except get back at Naraku."

"Will that bring her back!? Will it do me any good, provide me any tranquility or change the fact that I let her die! No, all I can do now is pray, pray that she comes back."

"Do you really want her back, no matter what?"

Sesshomaru was silent; he knew Inuyasha was talking about Kikyo. But this was different. Inuyasha got his time with Kikyo, why he even had Kagome. But who did Sesshomaru have?

"You can't spend your time dwelling on the past and what could've been. You've got to rule this country someday, create an empire, take care of Rin."

Sesshomaru eyes lightened as he gasped and spoke her name, "Rin, my child, my little one, where is she? Is she well?"

"She's sad, lonely and afraid. Go to her and be strong."

"Inuyasha, all this time I've thought you to be the fool, but here you are giving me a shoulder to lean on. My dear younger brother," he spoke with all sincerity, "I thank you and I will not forget this kindness you've shown me."

It was faint but Inuyasha noticed a small smile on his brother's face. He couldn't help smile himself, it was the first humane conversation they'd ever had. Too bad it had to come about like this, in a time of grief and sadness.

(Later that night)

"Is my Lord still sad," asked the small child looking up at Sesshomaru's face as he put her to sleep.

Sesshomaru, without saying a word, kissed her head and nodded as soon as she closed her eyes. He didn't want Rin to see him like that. He then lay on the grass closed his own eyes preparing to sleep for the first time in days. He quickly drifted off into slumber.

Sesshomaru was awoken that next morning to a constant beeping noise in addition to someone pinching his nose.

"Get down from there Rin, leave your father alone!"

Sesshomaru opened his eyes to see Rin's smiling face as she propped herself up on his chest. He turned his attention to the small statured, slender woman with long wavy black hair, wearing a pink sundress, high heels and earrings with feathers dangling.

"Kagura," he said with his eyes wide open, "how did you..." He looked around to study his surroundings.

"I'm in a…hospital?!"

"Yeah baby," Kagura said walking over to him to calm him down and explain, "You were in a car wreck, and you've been unconscious for over a week now. They said that you wouldn't wake up, but I knew you would, you're strong." She said kissing him gently.

Sesshomaru stoked her cheeks and wrapped Kagura in his arms. He was in no mood to fight back or ask questions, he just needed to see Kagura, no matter if all of it was a very long, very complicated, very stressful dream.

"Daddy, what about me? I made you all better and woke you up!"

Sesshomaru pulled back from Kagura and put his arms around the child, but they quickly fell back to the white hospital bed as he whispered, "what a crappy dream."

"Daddy?!"

"Don't bother him sweetie, I'm sure he's very tired."

Rin nodded her head.

"Wonder what's Daddy's been dreaming about to make him act so funny."


End file.
